Kind Gestures and Ways to Show Someone You Care - CarePages.com

Kind Gestures and Ways to Show Someone You Care - CarePages.com

• Offer to be there whenever your loved one needs to talk, even at three in the morning — the middle of the night is the worst time for many who are seriously ill.
• Never look shocked when you see how your loved one’s appearance has changed, and certainly never bring it up it. They are well aware of it. Don’t compare your loved one to anyone else in the same circumstances — this doesn’t help.
• “Do not let your loved one get away with things that might be harmful or wrong, just because they’re ill,” O’Brennan says. “Sometimes they need a wake-up call.”.
• Watch movies with your loved one, even if you hate the movie she chose; you can watch what you like some other time. That is what kindness is all about.
• Remember to be grateful when your loved one is able to get up and make dinner for you, or if your loved one attempts to help you with a home repair.
• “Your loved one’s illness is very personal; show respect for their privacy. Do not discuss their situation with friends or strangers without permission. Trust is invaluable,” O’Brennan advises.

Control issues

Caring for my parents has revealed that I have some control issues. I feel that I am in control. I know, from reading my Bible and several books about the Bible, that I am not really in control. God is in control of everything. I admitted that I was broken and asked God to please fix me. It hasn't worked so far.

This morning, dad decided to go out front and rake some leaves. I must have checked on him three times in fifteen minutes. I lack faith and I don't trust God. My head understands that I am not in control, but my gut won't let me turn loose.

When he came back in, dad was concerned because mom was asleep in the chair. I had placed a pillow beside her head so that, when she fell asleep and leaned to the right, she wouldn't hit her head on the desk or lean over too far and get a stiff neck. Dad decided that she needed to be awake so he began rocking her chair. She was startled awake and spoke out fairly loudly, but she was awake. As she began to doze off again, dad reached over and tapped her face, saying, "Wake up Darlin'; wake up." He tired of this fairly quickly and shuffled over to his chair, flopped down, and reclined.

This is a lot of information, detailing about twenty minutes of the day, but the point is that I continue to act like I'm in control, when I'm really not. As Steven Curtis Chapman once said, "God is still God and I'm still not."

This continues to be a difficult lesson for me, and I'm still working on it. I don't know if I'll ever really learn it this side of heaven, but I'm open to the Holy Spirit's direction and willing to follow where He leads.

Misery

Really feel awful today. The most negative I've been in a really long time. Don't want to continue to struggle. Ready to give up on life. I don't feel as if I've accomplished anything. I feel that my whole life has been a waste. Who have I touched? What lives have I changed? What good am I? I wish the LORD would take me home. I don't want to be here anymore. All those who depend on me would be better off without me. I would get to spend time in Heaven, basking in the glory of the LORD. What could be better than that?

LORD, please help me to get past this depression. I know that you love me. I know that you have positive plans for me. Why can't I just accept that in faith and enjoy what I have in peace. Jesus said he came to provide us an abundant life. My life doesn't feel very abundant. I'm not blaming God. It's my fault. I lack faith. I can't or won't trust. God PLEASE HELP ME!

Living the Christian life

This Week's Sermon Outline

I like this song.

Daily drudge

The day started out pretty slow. I woke up early and was able to take a short walk before getting mom up. I had a shower and shaved and then spent some time on the net (email, facebook, etc) and then got mom up for her morning routine. She was in a good mood today, eyes open , looking around, talking. Coffee and juice were enjoyable, no fuss, no fight.

I decided to read more in Sande's _Peacemaker_; this is a really good book and I'd like to get through it. I had plans to have the oil changed in my car and run some errands, but Tonya called about 8:30 to say that she would be late because of some problems at her child's school. Carol got to the house around 10:30 (I read Sande's book and took some notes while I was waiting).

Once we got mom settled I took off to take care of errands. First stop was Red's hardware for an extra key for Cory and a padlock for the back door. Then I went to the tax office, but it wasn't there any more. They had closed this office and the nearest open office was in South Pasadena, past the beltway, so I decided to head up to UH to see if I could talk to Felix about a job, but he wasn't there. It looked like a water haul for the day, but I decided to take a run out to the tax office to see if I could get my registration problems fixed. It's a pretty good drive from the UH to Spencer Highway past Red Bluff, but I finally made it out there.

The line at the tax office wasn't very long and, when I got to the front I explained that I had waited late to mail in my registration fees and that, although I had a copy of the canceled check that was deposited on the first, I still didn't have my registration sticker. The lady at the office was understanding and really nice. She printed out another copy of the registration sticker and didn't charge me anything for it - just asked that I bring the other one back to the office if I received it in the mail. I left there feeling as though I'd finally accomplished something.

I was headed to Starbucks on Spencer to grab some Caramel Macciato and a blueberry muffin when I decided to drop in at Schlotzky's and try out their wi-fi. I ordered a turkey sandwich plate and sat down to tune in to the internet but I never could get connected. Needless to say, I was somewhat disappointed. Just FYI, if you're in Pasadena, don't stop at the Scholtzky's on Spencer if you expect to connect to the internet. I took some pictures so you'll recognize the place if I can get them to download to this computer. The sandwich was really good, though.

I drove on over to the library to record all this stuff. I've got to make some adjustments to my day-planner and then I'll head home to work on the back door.

Quitting

I'm sitting at Starbucks, learning to make use of the wireless internet available at different places. I quit my job effective last Friday and I quit smoking effective Friday night at 10 PM, so now I have to find ways to occupy my time and to save money. If I disconnect my internet at home, I can use the wi-fi available at a lot of places around town: the library, starbucks, schlotzky's, etc. I'm looking for other places that are available.

The library is comfortable and fairly quiet. Starbucks is cold, I'm sitting right under an AC vent and it's blowing full blast. It's so cold I'm shivering. The smart thing to do would be to move to another spot, but I don't want to inconvenience anyone.

Ah, that's better. Now the AC vent is only blowing on my left elbow.

After I quit smoking I spent most of the first three days at home. I could lay down and go to sleep if the cravings got really hard. It was a holiday weekend anyway, so I really needed to stay at home and look after Mom & Dad. I have some more freedom today because we have caregivers at the house with them.

I really need to develop a plan for my days. The Franklin-Covey planner on this computer should help with that but, as usual, I'm putting things off. I need to develop a mission statement and work on some goals and roles and values.

Too cold in here. must move on!